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No Signal

Sat down on a bench at the mall, exhausted from Christmas shopping and whipped out my phone to kill time. But, guess what, no service.

There’s an initial disappointment in not being able to grab a quick Instagram fix or to inject yourself with news. But then there’s a surrender to the reality and eventually a sense of relief. We feel good about being forced to unplug.”

To me, that mean something significant. We realize the value of stepping away from constant connection but we are often unable to do it ourselves; unable to do it without the circumstance thrusting it upon us.

When I was growing up, blackouts used to happen often. Now they are rare. I loved them. I miss them. The flashlights. The candles. The dead TVs and limp Nintendos. Silence was an adventure.

In 2014 I quit smoking. In the years since then I’ve taken up regular exercise, a healthy diet, started producing the things I wanted instead of just talking, and this year I gave up drinking. Its clear I have will power, so 2019 will be the year of missing out, the year of wondering, the year of poor signal, the year of singing songs to myself and making shadow puppets on the wall. 2019 will be the year I build black outs and dead spots back into my life.

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